Decision Logs #2 The Night I Stopped Interrogating My Child
A small parenting decision about curiosity, control, and learning to enter a child’s world.
The Moment That Sparked My Curiosity
It was bedtime reading. The lights were soft, the books were open and we were going through our usual night routine when my 3 yr old son casually said something that caught my attention.
“Today my teacher was surprised.”
If you are a parent, you probably know what happens in that moment. Curiosity immediately wakes up.
Surprised about what?
What did he do?
Did he answer something smart?
Did he say something unusual?
Apparently this happened during one of their special Mondays in kindergarten when another teacher joins their class for songs and activities.
So I started asking questions.
“What happened?”
“She was surprised.”
“Why was she surprised?”
“I don’t know.”
“What did you say to her?”
He paused.
“She said my English is good.”
That made my curiosity grow even more. Now my brain was running faster.
What did he say in English? Did he answer something? Did he explain something about dinosaurs again?
So I asked again.
“What did you tell her?”
“Nothing.”
And that was the moment I heard it.
The irritation.
The short answers. The slight resistance in his voice.
It was a small signal, but it was clear. The conversation had stopped feeling like sharing and had started feeling like questioning.
And I realised something uncomfortable.
I was not really listening anymore.
I was investigating.
My curiosity as a parent had quietly turned into interrogation.
I could feel the conversation closing in front of me.
So I stopped.
Right there.
I did not ask the next question that was already forming in my mind.
Instead, I stopped and changed direction completely.
And the question I asked next was nothing like the ones before.